Jealousy Is Killing Me

I hate you,
Yes I said it,
I hate you,
I have never loved you
Never will,
I look in your eyes,
Wanting to kill,
Despise your standing,
Wish you could fall,
But you remain tall while I crawl,
I cut for pain due to my numbness,
I want to feel something,
But all I feel is hate and anger,
Shattered dreams, and conquered soul,
I want to feel whole,
If anything, I want to feel all,
I nod my head, but words utter otherwise,
I pick myself up, and I try to rise,
I speak with hate and cries,
Who really am I?
And why do I continue to try?
Why can’t I just die?
Why can’t I finally say goodbye,
I’m slave in my own body,
I want to be set free from jealousy,
Because jealousy is killing me, slowly.